I keep on thinking You’re losing patience,
That I deserve the constant condemnation,
That all I need in life is a vacation,
And then that it’s just my imagination.
I’m sorry for the times I scream,
It gets so bad it feels like a dream,
I’m horrified by my own need,
Lord, how did I find myself here?
I can’t afford my medicine,
They tell me I should just take less,
But now I’m out, I’m out again,
And it’s hard to see if I’m blessed.
I guess You’re just really patient,
And You already know how bad my pain is,
With Your help, God, I can sustain this,
I’ll lift Your Name high with worship and praises.
Wanting all I wanted got me haunted,
I’m just hoping now that You are on this,
That even though I can’t see, it’s You I honour,
Help me so I see that I am not a goner…
I’m bone-weary from this anxiety,
It’s all tears, anger gets stuck in my teeth,
Please, please help me to believe,
God, for Your sake, so I can see.
Repeat the same song until it’s my life,
Is this how I ought to pursue Your light?
It’s harder to see when I’m fighting this fight,
So can’t I let go and just follow You right?
Your grace is sufficient,
My prose gets proficient
When You lend Your assistance,
Lord, please give me permission.
If You’re by my side,
Lord, and if I abide,
I won’t trip or rewind,
Not if You’re on my side.
I cannot do this, but You did,
I’m falling through but You’re through this,
Big brother, Forerunner, dear God, please do things
That amaze my heart until worship’s exuded!
I can stir me up,
But I can’t overcome
Without the love
Of God’s own Son.