Reorient

I really need to quit patting myself on the back,
I know that it’s stupid to keep siphoning my own gas,
Not here to be perfect,
No, I know that I’m just workin’.

So let me be bereft of this repetitive self-theft,
Rather my hands were empty than building these argument tents,
Not finding life in this,
Not finding hope, I’m misfit.

Where’s the way when you’re wandering through?
See the light shining, but why’s there bumps in between?
Keep stubbing my toes, keep whining in prose, I’m,
Far between, so stuck, creased like a paper airplane,
Give me my familiar, just a soldier of the mind,
Give me my reconcilia-tion so I can find it.

Didn’t wake up to seek fear, not here to bequeath my sad-sided stoner eyes,
Gonna have to dig in heels, might wanna chock the wheels, get me notarized,
Wake me up one day without the fear, might just get what you expected all along,
Won’t be a disappoint forever, think the future’s got a point,
Don’t wanna be a glassy-eyed actor,
Just here to see and be a yes factor.

I’m a leaf in the wind, pulling pirouette sprees,
Can’t you see how this ends? In a lavender dream.
Knowledge is shapes that dance in the rain,
Wisdom is wind that directs its train,
Science is just a map of the stars, never prove it, distance too far,
Find a pinpoint of light, make it bright, telling a river it’s an oasis,
If you want a hint at the distance that we’ve made death relent,
Take a look at the goal of your hope, frozen cryostasis.
Can’t put the grape back into a raisin, caterpillars will fly, but the worm ends life as a moth.
The banks of a lake will never contain a river, unflowing, stagnant water doesn’t cut a sliver,
Yeah you think you’re only rapids, let the rocks within you vanish,
You’re not the wind or the rain, you’re the stream that just won’t wane,
This is life complete, can’t you point to Who sustains?

I’m not caught up in the whitewash, frothing rapids of my soul.
I’m not caught up in the whitewash, frothing rapids down below.

Can’t cut it yet, can’t say the fruit’s ripe, let me vent:
See, I’m not here ’cause of me, for me, but despite me,
I’m not writing this for you to see more than that I’m me,
Putting these words down ’cause I gotta turn ’round,
Got badly vented drains, plumbing in my brain’s got a couple extra bends,
But I’ve got life in excess, see, this is who I’m made to be.
So, sorry, not sorry, can’t apologize for that,
I am such a crappy sinner every day and that’s a fact.
Not here to succeed when I cannot even see,
Not here to impede the progress that’s before me.
It’s the Life in me that gives light to let me see,
It’s the Hope given me that enables me so free.
It wasn’t me who lived a perfect life,
It wasn’t me who walked and never fell to strife,
It wasn’t I who said it’s for anyone who believes,
And it wasn’t I who bled for the ones who couldn’t grieve.

So who am I to try and take the credit?
I’m not worthy, yeah, take that, you can bet it,
This is all so far from perfect but I know that it is worth it.
When life aligns with desire, you just can’t put out that fire.

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